What will it be?

A drawing by Yoshinori Takata and myself.
This was from a listening activity using comparatives.

In November, my supervisor at the BOE handed me my re-contracting forms and asked me if I would like to stay and teach another year.
Even prior to being officially offered another contract, a third year teaching in Oshima is something that has been weighing heavily upon my mind. I told my supervisor I would need time to think it over because I really wasn't sure at the moment if a third year is something I would be interested in doing. My supervisor understood and told me that he would need my final decision by February 1st.

With only a few days left until my decision needs to be made it came as no surprise to me that today after class my supervisor brought up the topic of the re-contracting forms. After briefly asking me how my classes had gone today my supervisor points to my re-contracting forms and tells me that if I need a little more time to decide, I can turn in my forms on the following Monday (Feb. 4th). After a moments pause to gather his thoughts he then says in his best English, " In a third year it is your happiness most important. It's your choice. Make your happiness choice". As much as I have heard these sentiments in their varying forms from friends and family it wasn't until I heard my supervisor saying them in his broken English that I really felt the impact of what these words mean.

I'm not sure if I believe in fate, but I'm not sure that I am convinced it  was mere coincidence that today- a day where I left school thinking about how much I love my students, even the trouble maker ones that cause me stress,- of all days would be the day that I would be so clearly directed to make the decision that makes me happiest.
I don't always love living in Japan. And I certainly don't always love living in Oshima. Heck, I don't even always love teaching. But one thing that I do know is that I love my students and I love to see them learning and progressing. It's often the small, nearly missable moments that makes my job feel so rewarding.  Like today when my first and second graders hosted a school fair for the older students. This was a free period, in substitute of a lunch recess, for the students to play fair/festival style games but as I walked through the gaming areas observing my students playing I could catch bits of English floating around: students counting out how many bowling pins had been knocked down, excitement over the prizes they won (cool/cute), and exclamations of "I'm winner".  Other times it is something more obvious that makes me realize how much I love teaching my students.  Many of my junior high school boys hate the fact that they are required to take English. Often when it is time to do speaking activities they will cheat and just show their friends the answer or tell them in Japanese what they are supposed to practice speaking. However, after some one-on-one practice to pronounce and understand the words on their worksheets they are at least a little more eager to try it out/show off to their friends. But the best feeling usually comes after, when in our next class these same boys will timidly raise their hands and ask me to come over and help them understand what a problem is asking instead of just copying off of their friends (or even worse) going to sleep.
Then of course there is also the blatantly obvious that serves as a daily reminder why I tolerate living in rural Oshima. The most egotistically rewarding part of my job, when I see my students reactions as I enter the school and English classroom. After about a year and a half of teaching them I assumed that my original novelty would wear off and that my students would begin to greet me with the standard mumbled "ohayo/konnichiwa" that most teachers receive. But no, everyday without fail my elementary students run through the halls (as fast as it is allowed) shouting, "Keri sensei", rushing to see who will be the first to get to me to say whatever English they can most easily recall that day (good morning, how are you, I'm cold, etc.) Even my most jaded of 3rd year junior high school students when looking up from whatever manga they are reading hidden inside of their English text book will give me a surprised "woah, keri sensei"as I enter the classroom, followed by a very brief smile before going back to their faux studying.  I don't know for certain how much of an affect I have on my students and their motivations to practice English, but I do know they have deeply affected me.

Even now after writing all of this I'm still not 100% sure which choice is the right answer for me. I'm certain that no matter what my final decision will be I will feel some degree of regret to either stay or to leave. Will I love living in Japan another year. Maybe, but maybe not. Will I love living in Oshima another year? Probably not. Will I be happy teaching my students for another year? Maybe not everyday, but there will be those days and those moments that makes the rest of the year and living in Oshima worth it. Is this post saying for certain that I will stay another year? Not at all. From the very first day back in November when I was asked if I would like to stay another year I knew my decision would not be made until the very last day when I draw out my signature and put the little tick next to  the box marked yes or the boxed marked no, and so it will be. I have a lot to think about still and even though I am leaning to stay one final year, I need to make sure that it is my "happiness choice"

Some photos from the school fair today

Prizes that students could win from the fair/gamebooths

Students seeing if they can complete the puzzles in 2 minutes to win a prize

One of the most popular games was this fishing game. There were 10 fishes with a metal paper clip inside them. Students had 1 minute and 30 seconds to catch as many with their fishing pole baited with a small magnet.

Punctuality

Hey all!

I haven`t got really much to post because I haven`t been to a school all week... :(
But I have got a small but long something to post because I haven`t been to school all week, and so here it is:

On Tuesday (11/1) I was scheduled to go to Ukashima elementary school, one of my two off island schools. But due to a series of unfortunate events, I never made it. It all started in the morning after breakfast. On a regular day I wake up around 7:25 eat breakfast, mozzy around, get dressed, and roll out of the apartment at 8:25 and get to work at just about 8:30. Which is perfectly on time. And normally there is no reason why I should worry about leaving the apartment before 8:25 because I know that without fail I will get to work at the latest, 2 minutes late. Well, it seemed that on this particular morning Murphy was trying to give me a fair warning by giving me a small taste of his infamous law.
So, what happened?
At 8:20 I am all dressed with my lunch packed, my school supply bag packed and ready to walk out the door when I reach to grab my keys off of the key hook. And lo and behold. When I drew my hand back there were no keys dangling from my unfortunately empty palm. Shit.
On a regular day without fail I always remember to place my keys onto the key hook to avoid one of these exact situations. So I try to maintain my cool and think for a few seconds....`aha! yesterday was not a perfectly normal day. It was actually a really exciting day because my large box of winter goods and oatmeal had arrived from my dad, which I had unpacked right beneath my beloved key hook!` So, with that burst of inspiration I begin to grope around within and around my box hoping that in all of my excitement of unpacking I had knocked the keys off the hook. But blasted, things are rarely ever that simple. Keys were nowhere to be found. Commence low-medium level freak out. I rush over to my little dining table scan about lift up a neatly folded sweater that had been lying there. nope not under that. Lift up my Japanese language notebook. Nope not under that. What the hell, might as well check under my laptop. Nope, not there either. And now it is 8:25. Double Shit. I look on my desk, dont see it there. Hurry and check the pockets of all the clothes I wore the previous day. Not there either. At this point I am freaking out. No keys, I`m going to be late, and although I can easily walk to work, there is no way I could walk to the ferry to catch the boat to my school at 11:30. Major freak out session ensues. I quickly double check everywhere I had already looked. not on my bed, not in my pockets, not on my table, not in or near my box. It`s 8:30 and I am screwed. Well, I figure I may as well walk to school and hope that my supervisor will drive me to the ferry and pray no one will decide to see if the foreigner remembered to lock her door (because yes, my car keys and apartment key are on the same chain).

So I begin the short trek to work, call my supervisor and tell him in the best Japanese I can muster: Hello! I am coming. Excuse me, I am sorry for being late!
Once at work, I figure it is best to bite the bullet and get the unfortunate car situation aired at the start. So again I try to think of the best way to tell them about what happened with the limited Japanese I have. And this is generally how it went.
`Good Morning...` (not as chipper as my usual good morning greeting) shuffle over to my supervisor....`....uhhhh excuse me, sorry, uhhh excuse me, today my car is not here`. (pause) I see the fear begin to creep into my supervisors eyes and I realize a moment too late that this statement was probably not the best way to open my conversation with my supervisor since he is quite aware of my track record in regards to my car (car in a ditch ring any bells?)...and so I quickly jabber out that: `ohh ohh ohhh my car is fine. it is fine. it is at home but...` and here begins the charades act because my Japanese is not good enough to string this into a proper sentence. I tell him I am ready to leave my apartment, and I begin to act out grabbing my keys off the hook and my astonishment at coming up empty handed and begin to say `not there, notthere....hmmm where where where where?!?!?!?` And pantomime a rabid search that turns up with nothing. At which I say: where?!? I dont know. lost (it). But In my apartment. My supervisor asks/pantomimes if I checked if I left my keys in the car Which then begins a conversation about my apartment being unlocked because the keys are together.

And needless to say, everyone in my office was at that point watching the spectacle that is me making little to no sense. Thankfully, the main guy in our office tells me (in all Japanese) Keri, you do not have school until 11:30, how about you go home with Mrs. Yanagihara and the both of you look for your keys. And so that is what we do. We get to my apartment and look through the box, and around the box. Check my pockets, my laundry basket. And Mrs. Yanagihara is checking under my sofa when I lift up my sweater off the table and my keys come tumbling out from one of the folds. AHA! and embarrassment all at once. Here are my keys!!!! What the heck are they doing folded in my sweater???? Who knows. But hooray, success, thank goodness! And we drive back to the office I show everyone my keys and hold a small slightly subdued (due to embarrassment) celebration of finding my keys.

But the unfortunate events sadly do not end here. Due to my fiasco of the morning you would think I would`ve gotten Murphy`s message (Primarily being that today was the day he was out to wreck havoc on my life) i get ready to leave for the ferry to go to school at 11:10. I figure it is more than enough time to do the 10 minute drive park and get on the ferry. FALSE, well partially.
I did get to the ferry in plenty of time. I was there at 11:20. but naturally (anything that can go wrong....) the parking lot was full. Shit. I recall that my supervisor told me it was ok to park at the elementary school nearby. So I drive over there. And ahaha, the usually 2 empty parking lots are chock full of cars (....will go wrong). Double Shit. I call my supervisor explain in the best Japanese I can muster which roughly translates to this. `Now I am at Shimanaka elementary school, but there are lots of cars. ` Thankfully he takes this to mean that there is no parking and he tells me that he will call the school and see if a teacher can help me out. Ok, well that is nice, except by the time the teacher rolls out it is 11:26. She tells me (in Japanese naturally, thank goodness I understood) That I could park at the closed down middle school, she points me into the direction. I drive over, park, shout my thanks, and break out into a run to catch the ferry because it is now 11:28 and this is Japan, if the ferry is supposed to leave at 11:30, it leaves exactly at 11:30.
And so I tear around the final corner of the ferry port, I am so close that I can see the ferry and the captain. I take a quick peek at my watch. Shit. it is 11:30. So I throw my hands up in mad desperation and begin waving away like a woman gone mad and shouting in Japanese (wait! Please Wait!) and in English (I`m coming! Dont Leave, please!) And what does that good ol ferry captain do? Give me the finger, rev that engine and tear out of the port like the rude fella that he is laughing hysterically. Well almost. Maybe there was no finger. And there might have been laughing, but it could`ve been a normal laugh at something the toll collector had said (maybe/probably about the psycho foreigner [me]). And needless to say I was left standing at the gangplank watching the ferry recede at a snail pass (having half the mind to jump into the water and go swimming after it it was moving so slow.) and hoping just maybe the captain was going to pull a U-turn because yes, I was still waving my arms in the air like a crazy woman. After a few moments I realize, no they are not going to turn around. I am screwed and I better call my supervisor.
After about 7 minutes of a mixture of Japanese and English I manage to tell my supervisor that I am fine. but I am not going to Ukashima elementary because...begin english...the ship left me. confusion ensues because he thinks i am saying that I am fine, I am on the way to ukashima on the ship. Anyway, after getting all of it sorted I was told, dont worry keri, come back to the office.
And so in a pissy defeated mood I hop into the car and drive at a snail pass back to work.

And that was my Tuesday.
I was rescheduled to go to Ukashima today since I missed Tuesday, and what does my supervisor say after our ritual morning greeting. Keri-san, please ferry Ukashima...Japanese Japanese.
hang my head and say: today I will leave at 11:00.
Now not only will I always be reminded of being a safety driver, but it looks like I will also always be reminded of my need to leave extra early to make the ferry.

Japan.

Hopefully not missing the boat (Modest Mouse reference?!)
Keri

http://youtu.be/YSfTdzoO4ic