My life as a 20-something single in Japan: This country is crazy! (See:Experiments in dating pt II)

Okay, so if you recall from my Post in January, I had somehow managed to bumble my way into a psuedo sort of dating kind of thing. Well, I figured it is about time that I created the follow up blog. Click here <- if you missed the original post.


Maps out this blog post rather nicely


Okay, so just to recap a little, last I mentioned of my Japanese beau was that the situation had
arrived at a one-sided `deeply ingrained` infatuation and a slew of texts culminating in `I love you, I want to drive down and see you`. Sound familiar (see: crazy!)? Well here is how the rest of the tale goes:

For the most part the following days continued as normal as possible, assuming you consider receiving consistent I love you/I want to see you texts as normal. Smooth sailing right?

Anyway, if a love induced text exchange begins so climatically (I love you, after one date) you figure it has got to plateau somewhere and eventually begin to tapper down. (I <3 the female orgasm lecture reference. Anyone?)

But, if you get what I am referencing to above (Which all of you should since I have conveniently decided to include a diagram at the top of this post), you will note that I have forgotten a key step in the cycle.

attempt at being culturally relevant by creating my first Meme

Desire- Reached (maybe even mutually) Excitement- Reached (I think it is fair enough to say that it was mutual, although the excitement may have came from two different sources), Plateau- Reached (I think we`ve sufficiently established that a relative calm consistency had been achieved), and Next I was expecting a nice tappering down that could be referred to as a Resolution.

And of course, before that could be reached it all had to culminate into one explosive orgasm of a crazzzzzy text.


(Yeah....I think we hit that peak.... -_-)

And yet, for some reason, I decided to throw sanity to the wind and go out on an innocent psuedo date with this guy. I mean psuedo because, date it was not. It was more of a dinner together with our friend Miguel. It seemed like it would be alright and a nice gesture seeing as a few days later he would be moving to Fukuoka. So, why not.
(Note: this post is about to get really garbled with intersecting events. I`ll try to make it as sense making as possible, but I can`t really promise anything, so bare with me)

So, after work on Feb. 3rd I drove myself to the station and mentally prepared myself for seeing my Japanese man friend again for the first time since our last encounter. And I suppose it only makes sense that on a day that I am half out of my mind about to go on a crazzy psuedo date that I land myself into another crazy Japanese dating scene experience.

Like I said, I was waiting at the train station, in the cold (very relevant, not really, but it was really cold) minding my own business just waiting to go on my non-date, when one of the Japanese High School students waiting for the train next to me decides to step up his game from Level 1 (making covert glances in my direction) to Level 2 (art of small talk). He decided to open with the generic remark, `It`s cold isn`t it.` I figured that this a good opportunity to practice my Japanese and told him, yes it is [feckin] cold, I`m from Hawaii and I don`t like the cold. And we progress through small talk of `What are you doing in Japan, What school do you go to, How old are you, etc.` After having reached the topic of age, my new acquaintance decided there was no better time than to ask me, `So are you married`. I was a little taken aback and in my shock reverted back into English, `Did you just ask me if I`m married?!?!?!?!?` No I`m not married, are you crazy I`m only 22, look no ring (pointing at my finger). At which point he decides to tell me that he is not married either, accompanied by suggestive smile and wink.
Thankfully about 1 minute later the train arrived, I rammed in my earphones and made sure there was at least one train car in between me and my deranged lover.
Seriously, Japan!?!?


Save these kind of questions/statements for at least the second [real] date

But anyway, lets get back onto topic. Me and my psuedo date with my Japanese man crush. After this odd experience I felt like I was pretty certain I could handle any odd statements/questions my Japanese crush might say to me, because at least they are semi expected now instead of out of left field.
Turned out dinner went smoothly, no crazy protestations of love, moving in together, or marriage. And so, I decided why not stay a bit longer since Miguel had decided to call up more friends so my Japanese friend could have a proper farewell party. And things continued to go along rather swimmingly, I may have even said a few flirty comments at him, or at least saying, `it is such a shame you are moving to Fukuoka (that is flirty right?).` Anyway, due to an odd twist of events (me missing the last train) he offered to drive me to Yanai as I was planning on spending the evening with my friend Ciaran. Which was a really sweet gesture (can you tell I am beginning to fall?). During our 45 minute car ride or so he told me a lot about his past and his hopes and dreams, and we even shared our thoughts on the Japanese education system, which were all really interesting to hear. It`s not often that I can actually hold these more serious conversations with Japanese people seeing as my Japanese is pretty shabby and their English is not much better. And in those moments I really began to understand/agree with one of the texts he had sent me previously that said ` I think if we are a couple we can get newer and broader perspectives with our lives` (Amazing English, right?). (I mean if I wasn`t falling before, I`m sure I must be about there now).

At this time I also voiced some of my concerns over an idiotic mistake I had made earlier that morning. I wanted to know if he could tell me if there was any way possible that I could retrieve my burnable trash which I had put out that morning to be collected and at some point burned. (Japan has crazy trash collection methods). Reason being was that I realized a little too late that I had thrown one of my wallets containing my foreign registration card (and thankfully not much else) in the trash. He said he was pretty sure there was nothing to be done, but that he would look into it. I kind of brushed this aside figuring, yeah ok, probably not.
Anyway around this point we arrived at Yanai and so I invited him up to meet my friend Ciaran and some of our other friends who happened to be over. After having some snacks and playing a resounding game of scattergories I saw him to the door (I even received a small kiss on the cheek to my shock and maybe even more surprising was that I wasn`t particularly opposed to the gesture). Have I driven off the cliff of madness? (probably). Upon returning to the house I asked Ciaran, Erez, and Kyle and the other Japanese guests what they thought of my friend. They all agreed he was quite handsome, had AMAZING English, and that he seemed nice and like a great person. I later told them he was the guy from my dating blog post. Their response: `Oooooh, he`s that guy...!?!? Well, he seems nice (see:sane) enough in person.

And here is where I knew I fell off the deep end.
The next morning I wake up to a text from my Japanese man friend that said (In Japanese, I told him to text me in Japanese only so I could work on improving) 大島の役場に電話したけど、もう全部　燃やしたって。And for all of you, who`s Japanese isn`t as on par as mine it translates to: I called Oshima`s town office, but they said they have already burned everything (referring to the trash). Seriously! Not only did he remember my concern over my accidentally thrown out wallet but he followed through, of his own accord and called to see if he could somehow save the day and procure my wallet. Seriously, i think I hit an all time high in life.

About two weeks later, after a few more mild/conservative texts my friend Ciaran told me. `Keri, grow a pair and ask him out on a date already. If you don`t want a boyfriend, don`t like him, or don`t want to go out with him again, you don`t have to, that is the beauty of it all. There is no need for commitment at this point.`
I thought about what Ciaran said for a moment. And, as much as I`m opposed to a relationship right now, I figured maybe it is just what I need to pull myself out of the stooper I`ve found myself in. After all, like Ciaran said. It`s just one date, and I had found myself slowly but surely reaching some level of enamor. So I did it.

4 hours later this is the response I get:
I`m so sorry. Keri, to be honest I decided to return to my ex-girlfriend. It was so hard to make a decision and I`m still in love with you.

fml.

Looks like I have made my way through the dating lifespan (according to the sexual response cycle anyway). Desire, Excitement, Plateau, Orgasm, and Resolution have all been actualized.


My Japanese friend`s identity shall be a bit of a secret,primarily to protect the innocent.Secondarily, Just in case I have Japan goggles

Observations: If you happen to meet a handsome guy, with great English don`t wait until the last minute to get your shit together.
Even if he does send some chill inducing texts.


Final Observation: I still think dating is too complicated.

Lo Lo Lo La Lola!

You can tell I`m not particularly motivated to write a blog when I give it a uninspired title (actually I changed the title, this new title is inspired) and fill it with lots (lots) of pictures.

So, today since I am not in a particularly blog writing motivated sort of mood I figured I may as well make good on my promise from my past posts regarding `Things to Look Forward to:` and post some pictures from my trip down to Nagasaki and maybe add some commentary. So let`s have at it!


Okay, so here is a map of Japan. Note that I used high technology to illustrate my start point (Oshima) my destination (Nagasaki) and the Oregon trail that I traveled across to get to the land of milk and honey (and goldfish lanterns, wait can`t I just see those in Yanai????) Now, how about you have a guess as to how long it took me to get from the island of Awesome to the land of lanterns (distance: about 244 miles). Think about it.



Now let me relate to you a little anecdote. Yesterday I was at my Eikaiwa (adult english conversation class) and we were each taking turns talking about where we want to travel to and why. After listening to my students (?) tell me that they wanted to go to Singapore, Germany, Mt. Fuji, and America, it was my turn to tell them where I want to go. And so I said that the place I most want to visit is New Zealand,and geeking out about how lord of the rings was filmed there, the hobbit is being filmed there and it is gorgeous (not to mention I want to be a kiwi)! Anyway, maybe you are wondering what this story has to do with Nagasaki, and why I am including it in this post, well I`m getting to it so be patient. After that my students began talking about how New Zealand is really beautiful and they have nice weather (in the summer season) but then they told me, `Keri, New Zealand is so far! Maybe it is 10 hours by plane.` then pause. `But, maybe it isn`t so bad, after all it took almost 5 hours(!!!!!!!!) for you to go to Nagasaki (I had told them about my trip during our last class). But, yes. A nice 244 mile trek took me nearly 5 hours! Worst.Ever!

Anway, I guess it was worth it (see: it really was worth it but I am still bitching about the distance).

Alright, (I`m feeling a bit more blogging motivated, probably from the bitching) so it was kind of a spur of the moment idea to go to Nagasaki. A friend had clued me into the Lantern Festival and a quick glance at the google images results peeked my interest. So after about a week of debating the question `To go or not to go (that is the question)` I found out that Taylor, a girl from my prefecture was planning to go down, and also my friend Jasmine (who lives on a manini island off of Nagasaki) was also planning to make the trip. So, with that I figured why the hell not, and packed my bags, booked a hostel, and bought some train tickets.
4.5 hours later:

Awesomeness!!!!!!



So that evening Taylor, and I and my new friends Joel and Larissa (ALT`s from Kumamoto) ventured around taking photos of lanterns and lit up creature like lantern things. We also ate some questionable Chinese food (to celebrate a belated Chinese New Year), visited a shady American bar with even shadier bartenders, and got lost in the pleasure district (or so I dubbed it) and ate more food.




Taylor, Larissa, and I hanging out with a deranged Panda.
(Photo courtesy of Awesome Kumamoto JET Joel)




Year of the dragon!!!!

The next morning I woke up fairly early to meet my friend Jasmine and her super awesome Nagasaki ALT friends at the train station.
But, before they could appear I saw the most AMAZING/AWESOME boy ever!


Seriously, this kid is like a quarter of my age and already 100000000 times cooler than I will ever be!

Anyway, after meeting up with Jasmine and her friends we made our way to the Nagasaki Peace Park.




This monument symbolizes the hypocenter of the bomb drop. I like the concentric circles that radiate out from the center, it was an interesting visual representation.

After meandering about the peace park we made our way over to China Town to check out all the festivities and admire the lanterns. :D







Pig heads, but why?


Am I back in Yanai?????


Jasmine and I being genki tourists in Japan!


The lanterns were really awesome, and well worth a trip (nearly 5 hours!!!!!) to Nagasaki. But the reason for a return visit: Lola!

Who is Lola? Only the most awesome amazing D-List celebrity in all of Japan!!!! After enjoying the lanterns The Awesome Nagasaki JET`s and I went to Lola`s awesome/crazy/amazing karaoke bar. Too. Much. Fun. I think you have to go there to really understand how awesome this place is! P.S. Before we left Lola gave all of us a signed headshot!!! Amaze! (It is hanging on my wall!)


The super fun Nagasaki JET`s and I enjoying Almas` and Owain`s rendition of Park Life. Nagasaki is well worth another visit just to see these awesome people again too!
(Photo courtesy of Awesome Nagasaki JET Karl)


Ali, Lola, and I. Isn`t he something.
(Photo courtesy of Awesome Nagasaki JET Ali)

Origami Cats!

Just in time for Valentine`s Day, a sure fire way to win over your crush or impress your sweetheart, origami cats! Nothing says `I love you` better than a super cute origami cat made with love. They are also really great for decorating your desk! These little bebes stole the show in my dating post and so as promised, a post dedicated to making these cuties!
Supplies needed:
one (at least) piece of origami paper (once you`ve made one it`s hard to stop, they are soooo cute).
a pen or marker
some patience (these cats are a hassle, but worth it)

Lets start!

1. Fold origami paper diagonally in both directions. Also fold horizontally and vertically. After doing each of these folds individually your origami paper should have the following creases.



2. Next you want to push your two horizontal (marked off in yellow) creases into each other at the center, which will cause your origami paper to collapse down into a triangle.




3. Choose either side of the triangle to work with and fold the two triangle flaps facing down in towards the center crease of the triangle.



4. Next, flip your paper over so you are looking at the other triangle on the back, point facing away from you. Again, you want to fold the flaps in towards the center crease but this time fold them up instead of down.



5. Re-open/unfold the flaps from step 4. Now you want to fold the top of the triangle to fit within the folds we just made (pink dots). Afterwards, unfold them again. All of the creases we just made will be important for our next steps.





6a. Now for one of the trickier folds (once you`ve got it, it wont prove much of a challenge to re-enact). First, make sure the point of your triangle is pointing away from you. Now, look at the base of the triangle and you will notice that there is a sort of mouth like opening.



6b. Push open the `mouth`/white part of the paper until it folds against the crease we made in step 5 (thicker dots in picture 5 above). Doing this should also cause the triangles flaps to follow. Fold these down against the white of the origami paper. If done properly it should look like this:



7. Now take the top (where my thumb is) and fold it down. You should be able to see the crease we created earlier that I indicated with thick dots. Also, notice that the crease is a divider between a triangle and rectangle shape. This will be the rectangle that I refer to in the next few steps.



8. Next you want to fold the rectangle into itself. So push the bottom in and under until it reaches our middle crease (where the thick dots were) that is our triangles base. Like this:



9. Now take the two end flaps of the rectangle and fold them up to the center crease, creating two little triangles on both ends.



10. Unfold all of these so that we are back to the original triangle figure from step 7. And turn it so the triangle is pointing towards you. (in the photo below, it is facing the wrong way)



** WARNING WARNING**
This next step is the most pain in the arse step! The instructions I was given were extremely vague (fold top of head down inside), but hopefully my instructions and photos will make it a bit more clear/simplified.

11. Notice the blue dots I`ve drawn onto the paper. You will want to fold these in one at a time. But at the same time you will also need to fold the crease marked off in yellow in and down into the little pocket.






This is what it should look like when it`s done. Once you have completed this part, everything that follows is a walk in the park.



12. Now flip the cat over so you are looking at the side of paper with no white showing, keeping the point of the triangle facing you. And fold down the two pointy flaps that you made back in Step 3, like this (the thing sticking up in the middle are the flaps that I am pushing down):



13. Next, fold in the edges of the two flaps we pushed down.


14. Fold the two bottom flaps up, however high or low you want. This will determine the height of your cat. I wanted a baby cat, so I folded the flaps as high as I could.



15. Next you want to flip your cat over so that you are looking at the side with the two white squares. Lift up the bottom of the triangle and fold the point up and under so that it touches the crease. Can you see the beginning of a cute little cat face?





16. Now for our cats ears. Fold the white squares diagonally into the top of the cats head to create cute little pointed ears.



17. Next, flip your cat over again and fold in the edges of the face a bit to give the cat a smaller (thus cuter) face.



18. Flip your cat over one last time and draw in her/his paws and face.


And Meow, you are done!



(Not only have my cats found love, but now they also have a baby kitten!)

decision making.

Me with a goldfish (they`re baaaaaack!) trucking around Nagasaki.

Hey everyone,
So unfortunately my adventures/experiments in dating have come to a bit of a close. So, today you wont be regaled with amazing/awkward stories. But, maybe next post? Seeing as how popular the topic of dating in Japan (<- click here if you missed it, you wont regret it) was, maybe for the sake of viewership I will need to go out and have a few more misadventures in dating. If I`m completely honest it is at least mildly entertaining.

I know I said I would post about cat origami next, but...I haven`t got my camera with me right now, and those cats are a betch to fold! Next post, I promise! And if it`s not, then well you can think of the punishment. Boycott my blog maybe?

Usually I try to post about some of the weird crazy things that happen to me while here in Japan,or else the really hectic things (car in a ditch!?!?). But today I thought I would post something, a bit more personal, which I guess is putting myself a bit out of my comfort zone because I dont usually like to publicly share a lot of my personal thoughts. Anyway, hopefully it will still be enjoyable, if nothing else it will occupy about 3 minutes of time if you are like me and have nothing to do today.

Time has been breezing by and if you have been checking my blog posts regularly you may recall that way back in November through to January some of my posts thought about the topic of continuing my year on JET. Well, it is now February, the month of reckoning, and from what I can gather most of my friends in the prefecture have made up their mind, signed and turned in their contracts. If you recall from a few posts back I had a few questions for myself to consider prior to signing, here is a refresher:
Where do I want to be next year? What would it mean for me to sign up for another year? Do I want to put the rest of my future plans of grad school, etc. on hold to spend a second year teaching in Japan? I`m really not sure. But I am sure that by the end of this month, in under 20 days I will have made my decision for sure for sure. Truth be told, I think I already know what I want to do (and I think I`ve known for awhile), but it is pretty difficult to think that once I sign those papers I cant really change my mind one way or another.

These were some of the questions I had to mull over before being able to be confident in signing my contract one way or the other. I didn`t want to jump into a a half thought through yes or no, and so about a week and a half ago, on a particularly long (2 hour) train ride by myself I decided that there was no better time to go over my thoughts. And with that, after about an hour of thinking and internal arguing, I began a little note to myself that was a bit of a condensed version of what I had thought through which ran as follows:

22 years old. It's weird for me to think that when I was younger I used to imagine that at 24 I would be married and at 27 beginning a family. I think when you are a child of 10 you can't really grasp that in your early 20's you will be just as young at heart and have the entire world waiting at your feet. I'm 22 nearly 23 and know now that I am not at all ready to give up my hopes, ambitions, or independence whether that be in the form of marriage or maybe even a boyfriend. Likewise I don't find myself particularly eager to rush back to school. I figure that if you can only be young once why should we waste our prime sitting in a class researching and writing papers. I am never going to be as actively fit nor free of responsibilities as I will be during my 20's. Right now I am accountable to no one but myself (and maybe my boss if I want to keep my job) and no one is particularly accountable to me. It's a liberating feeling to think that if I should want to pick up and move to New Zealand for a year or two no one is holding me back except for myself (and of course the necessity of funds). As a young adult the options and opportunities in life are endless. Our youth is the time to experiment, take risks, get a little lost, and make mistakes. Somewhere along the road we will get ourselves back on the right path and those mistakes we made and risks we took will be the lessons we take away that will let us know which path is the one that will lead us to the destination we hope to reach. This being said I have decided to stay in Japan a second year, and after that, well who knows. For now the rest of my life can wait.

And with that the next 18 months of my life have been decided.


More posts shall be coming soon, I`ve been up to a lot of mischief, or something like that. But I figured it is about time I let my friends/family know what I`ve finally decided.

Things to look forward to in coming posts: Origami cats (I promise they are coming!!!!), Nagasaki Lantern Festival, and maybe more on dating (Tonight I think I am going on a psuedo-date with my Japanese chap from `My life as a 20 something single: Dating in Japan`. But does it really count as a date if you`ve got a chaperone of sorts?)